Disappearing weekend

Here it is Sunday evening, and I am exhausted.  Strangely enough I had a good time.  Saturday night I ended up in a small rural community with a big fundraiser event.  Country hospitality at it’s best.  It was good to see it still exists actually.  With the so called progressive society today, this community still possesses the old fashioned bush traits is is renown for.  So relaxed.  A band had been bought it, not sure of their name, but they were a tribute band playing Eagles music.  They were very good actually, even though I am not a big Eagles fan, never have been.  But by the amount of people there, the atmosphere and setting was ideal.  Who watches the clock in the country, we were in bed before the sun comes came up!  I was up not that long after though, as we had to head back to town for a car club breakup BBQ at the local marina.  Diversity, I am thinking that I am lucky to be able to have the best of town and country, but of course it does have it’s drawbacks.

Getting back to the unit at dinner time, and of course I didn’t need dinner after grazing all day, I have had a shower and decided to post my excursions.  My son is OK, I think by the evidence in our garbage bin, empty pizza boxes and alcohol bottles, he may have had some friends over.  He says he will drive me to work tomorrow, so I am off to bed, before I fall to sleep typing this.

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Quick post

Been an interesting day, but I am heading bush later this afternoon.  Seems I have an interesting time in front of me.  A huge weekend.  I have agreed to go to a fund raising event tonight and a breakup BBQ back in town tomorrow.  Should be interesting.

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Up ‘n at ’em

Yet another day in paradise.  Who ever coined the phrase – “Thank God it’s Friday”?  Just another day for me, but all it really means is that I won’t be woken up by the alarm song of “Ain’t no stopping us now”, that I have set on my phone.  Gets me going each morning.

I actually got a call from my phone service provider today.  It was a bubbly ladies voice telling me my contract is up on my phone, so they want me to lock-in again. YEAH RIGHT!!  I have been waiting for 20 months for this to expire.  Two years ago they gave me a new to get me off CDMA network which they have now shutdown – replaced by the “G” network.  They said it was better for us rural people – here I go again – YEAH RIGHT!!  Many dead spots as I don’t live in the big smoke!  Anyway, the phone they “gave” me came with a 2 year contract, $20 per month, but $25 worth of free calls.  But after three months the phone kept shutting itself down.  No apparent reason.  I would charge it, then bang, turn off again. So I rang them as was told I should take it to one of their stores.  Did that, no avail.  Even both stores in my area, they wanted to charge me $50 to have it sent away and looked at to see if it was repairable.  What the heck!  It should have been under warranty.  It was also their company branded phone.

Telstra. I nearly succumbed to paying the money, but when told it would be between 2 to 4 weeks depending if it could be fixed and the quote received and approved of course.  Again.. what!!  But what was I supposed to use for that time?  They offered no replacement phone!!  I know for a fact that both the other companies do, Vodafone and Optus, as at different times my sons phones have been sent away to be repaired. (They are rough on phones) So back then I decided to give them the flick when my time ran out. I have been using an old phone from work, they get new ones every two years and we have a draw full of bits and pieces.. Nokia 4 years old, pretty good. So roll on 2nd December and I am off to Optus.

Car parts saga: getting to be that way. I got a call from my son that the part had arrived. Hallelujah..and could I pick it up on my way home from work.  So I did just that. Actually finished work early so it would give him time to go out and fit it.  Wishful thinking.  I went in and first thing was the price.  He had been quoted $26, he had showed me their card with the part no and the price on it.  They wanted $86.  They did check and said no, it was $86 and I didn’t have the money on me, so I had to use my credit card begrudgingly, hopeful that my son did actually have the money to pay me back.  It look different to the one sitting at home on the bench, but they assured me it was the right one, as he had taken the old part in when he ordered it.  So off I went and got the part to him, he immediately drove out to fit it. His car is out at his father’s property, but the dreaded phone call.  It was the wrong part.  So he came back in and picked me up and we took it back.  By this time it was 20 minutes before closing time on a Friday afternoon.  After much discussion and checking the broken part, that we again took with us, they also decided that it was the wrong part and offered a refund which immediately I took.  So straight over the road to Toyota dealers, they ordered the part and we had to pay in advance for it. $54.  They guaranteed it would be there on Wednesday morning to be collected.  I certainly hope so, this has been going on for weeks now.  How hard can it be.  To think that I was even doubting my son that he had ordered the part in the first place.

After all that, I headed out to my husband place for the night.  Hopefully it will be relaxing.

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Do I or Don’t I???

How could I forget to put fuel in the car, beeping and lights flashing as soon as I turned on the key.  Price had dropped to $1.29 per litre.  I was surprised, but I managed a bit more for my money. lol  buying power!!

Work was boring, not much to do, probably the calm before the storm.  Middle of the month though, and all systems working well, for how long, well who knows?

DEN ??  I get the impression he didn’t go to his appointment.  Not in the best mood, I really don’t think he is feeling well.  Maybe really tired, but I hear him up extremely early in the mornings.  Maybe he isn’t even going to bed.  I don’t know, and I am not game to ask.  What I will say thought is “what on earth am I going to do with him?”  I wish DEN would contact me so we can try and work out a solution to this.  The tick off sheet system is NOT working!!!  Helloooooo anyone listening?  of course not you twit, you are talking to yourself.  Don’t make waves, someone might be woken up and actually have to do something!!  Ah what the heck, it is only me that cares.  I am no head shrink, just a lowly mother who can see a human being being eaten from the inside out.  Suffering in silence.

I read a newspaper today, yes shock to the system.  I don’t usually, but there were a few things in there that really fire me up.  I have been toying with the idea of adding another category to my blog – to voice my opinion on society traits, and how we just sit back and be bullied by society. Society either being Governments or even the Loud Minority.  If I get fired up enough, I just might do it!!

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Gripe for the day

Car again!!  I get the impression from my son that he is losing belief that the part when it turns up won’t get his car going anyway.  He desperately needs a better car.  He wants a job, but he doesn’t actively look for one.  He is expecting DEN to open the door for him.  He has an appointment with them tomorrow.  Says he will walk down as it is only a few blocks away.  He needs the exercise, so fingers crossed they might have some positive news.  But, I seriously doubt it.  In my mind, they see him and tick him off the list that he fronted. Proceed to make another appointment, send him on his way, and get his file out on the day of his next appointment.  I don’t know for sure, but I certainly don’t see any productivity on their side either.  He really does want to work, but needs a hand to open the door for him.  He would love to be part of something, and the longer this BS goes on, the harder it will be for him. :bashes head on wall:

He has gone out this evening to play poker.  He sometimes plays a couple of nights a week, but his girlfriend is not working tonight so they went together, they walked. No doubt I will get a call later to come and pick them up.  The CBD is not the best place to be walking around at night.  Many times they have been pulled up by police asking what they are doing?  This day and age has the younger folk on the defense, as the police seem to harass more than protect these days.  They try to keep out of those circumstances.

The city has no public transport as in buses or trains.  Only a taxi service.  Well if you can call it a taxi service.  It really is a joke.  Last Saturday night my husband and I went on a harbour cruise, we returned back to the Ferry Terminal at about 11pm.  I rang for a cab on docking.  I was unable even to get through, engaged, then after getting a tone as if the phone was ringing, seemed to divert then drop out.  I made about 10 calls over a period of 40 minutes.  We weren’t the only ones. There was about 30 others waiting as well.  They also couldn’t get through.  One had prebooked, and we decided to start walking.  We walked along the main and only road to the Ferry Terminal, not seeing one car, taxi, nothing the whole way.  So I don’t know what happened with those still waiting behind.  Took us 45 minutes to walk home, which was pretty good considering we had consumed a couple of drinks!  But not a taxi in site.  Nearing home a police car slowed down and checked us out.  Other than that no cabs.  It was a Saturday night for goodness sake.  But that is typical of this town, I guess.

Well that is my gripe for the day.  I did consider giving my friend a call earlier and see if she wanted to go for a coffee, but after checking I only have a couple of dollars already earmarked for petrol.  @##@ forgot to put the fuel in the car.

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Am I selfish?

I am struggling today – I don’t know why.  Maybe my vision is impaired or I don’t feel well.  Ha, always looking for an excuse.  Seems I am heading down a lonesome road, nowhere to go but down.  My own fault – I admit it.  I am tired of hanging on – maybe it would be easier/better? to just let go.

But I have too many people relying on me.  What happens to my husband and sons?  Damn, I got myself into such a web.  No matter what I do I hurt somebody.  Am I being selfish?  I really don’t know, maybe I am.  All I ever wanted was to help, or is that my problem.  Once I used to say, all I ever wanted was to be a good person!  Do I care too much?  Give me a break ——  I really don’t know what I want anymore.  Perhaps nothing.  Everybody expects something from me!  Or do I just think that? I really do think I have lost the plot.  In time they would all be better off without me.

I don’t care about my physical well-being, but I do care for others.  Is that where I went wrong in this “me, me” society that we exist in?  Even the simplest lifestyle seems unobtainable to me.

I wish I had a switch to leave all this earthly BS, because I would flick it now.  The hard part of  life..LIVING!

Talking about being self-centered – I just read what I wrote – OMG!! I am a hypocrite.

Note to self: (forget how you feel – consider others)

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I wonder how the poor people exist?

Took the car!!  Apparently, no need for it today, and he did spend most of the day in bed.  Mind you, the fuel gauge says empty.  Tomorrow I will put a couple of $$$ in.  The price of fuel is $1.48 per litre today, hopefully tomorrow it may have dropped as it usually does mid week.  How can they do that???  But they do!  Next payday is still a week away.  There is a possibility that we will both be walking!! LOL  I have to laugh as if I don’t, I might cry.

“I wonder how the poor people exist?”  sorry, just something that popped into my head.  Society has made us how we are today –

I don’t listen to the radio or watch TV.  I would like to watch TV, but I don’t have one, and not by choice.  My son has one, but he uses it for his xbox and watching DVD’s.  I don’t think he can get free TV as it is not a digital one as it is pretty old. (See how society wants you to spend money and buy those consumer-ables)  I don’t really miss it anyway.  You get used to living with what you have.  The Internet is the only luxury I have, and it is an all in one the way I see it.  I can read all the latest news if I want, also you tube is entertaining at times. I also load and charge my ipod.  Plenty to keep me amused, plus as I don’t go out, the cost of having the Internet is cheap if you work it to a weekly expense, about $10. Plus my son uses it as well for his gaming and who knows what else. Plus email.  I don’t get many, but at least it is there.  Well yes I get plenty of ones wanting me to buy something 🙂  SPAM

Seems I have lost the plot today.  Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.  Staying positive – not posting negativity, am I?  Some days I go back and read what I posted previously – I am definitely posting my thoughts and experiences.  No holding back – well maybe just a few expletive words 🙂

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Doubts

The new day arrived, I remember this morning taking a deep breath after my alarm woke at at 5:30am.  I don’t even remember the shower or making the coffee!!  But looked at my phone for time – it was time to go to work.  I woke my son and he was in a pleasant mood and took me no problems, also turned up a bit earlier to pick me up this afternoon.  He must have ESP.  I was thinking that I would love to get out of here when he pulled up.

He had been to check to see if his part had arrived. No, still not here, which I find strange as it is taking so long. Could this be a ploy to keep my car??  Surely not!  He wouldn’t do that to me, would he?  I don’t think he would.  No, surely not.  But he seems to even keep the keys these days!!  Nah.. not going there.

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Lazy Sunday

I must have crashed last night.  I blinked and it was Sunday.  My husband left early and he had some very important ‘car’ work to do.  I didn’t argue, I just rolled over and went back to sleep.  Later on I potted around all day, doing little things here and there, but nothing in particular.  Even sitting outside with a cup of coffee listening to Sarah McLachlan on my ipod.  I find this relaxing and day dream, with the added advantage of blocking the rest of the world out. Before I knew it, it was nighttime.  Tomorrow is another day and back to the rat race.

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Cruising

Whew what a day it has been.  After a trying evening last night out at my husband place, we both calmed down and enjoyed each others company.  Of course the hiccup was fired by the boys, both of them, a miss understanding.  But that is water under the bridge now, well, for the time being.

I feel really bad.  My husband serviced my car for me.  He paid for all the oil and the oil filter, plus did the work.  I don’t ever want to ever owe him in anyway.  Was sort of against the grain, but what can I do.  He used the excuse that we went away in my car.  So what.  The car is the only possession I have in this world, apart from a computer and an ipod. I just hope he doesn’t think that I use him.  Because I don’t.  I don’t like even to eat there as I feel I owe him for that as well.

Here we go again, we went on a club dinner/cruise.  It was absolutely great, and I had a good time. But again, he paid for the tickets $40 each.  I am rather embarrassed that I don’t have that sort of disposable income, but I was again victim of “being paid for”.  I just hope he doesn’t think I am using him, as I am not!

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